I got to catch up on my Netflix list this weekend and I can't help but share how the documentary: "Trophy Kids" is an absolutely MUST SEE if you are a parent!
As much as the movie is about parents who want to raise trophy winning kids, and believe absolutely that their kid is worthy - if you're reading this - I want you to watch it and watch the teens WHILE THE PARENT IS TALKING! What is going so wrong is how the parents never shut up! I mean it. I don't care if its sports, academics, careers or future expectations - it's NOT about the potential scholarships - these parents are so fear filled they don't take one minute to LISTEN!!! All of them - despite the content just never stop talking. Some are true bullies. Some are projecting their anxiety or fantasies. ALL of them don't let their child be themselves - share their view- listen to their perception and experience of the SAME event!
If you want to be a great parent and have a LIFELONG relationship with your kid(s) - SHUT UP and LISTEN! Seriously. It's THAT simple. Just watch the tears, frustration or complete 'zombie' like stance these kids take to deal with a parent who never stops talking! I have witnessed this over and over - and its WHY kids TEXT!! They shift to simple texts to get a word in edge wise -to shut down the lecture, the speech, the monologue, diatribe, hate speech, bully pulpit, or even the 'find God' or "Jesus Saves" NOISE. . . yes noise. To them its noise. Remember the Peanuts with the parents being nonsense noise - that's what non-stop talking is to kids!
START ASKING QUESTIONS. Get them sharing about THEIR opinion, their view, their concerns . . . its profound what they are managing in their quiet hearts and souls. . . I get to hear it every day . . . and if you don't LISTEN - I get to hear them as adults who are way too often severely addicted to something - have crappy relationships and struggle with innate worthiness as well as not understanding that their direction has to come from internalized sense of purpose and initiative NOT external - because someone told them so or 'made them.'
Watch it soon - It is the most clear way of addiction prevention I've seen in years!